THE "syndrome"

Okay in this article i`ll be talking about a particular ilk of people. so if any of the readers belong to this ilk then read each line carefully and try to reform yourself and oust this god gifted quality of yours :-D

i`ll call people infected with THE "syndrome" ZombieX.

so u can basically come across a ZombieX practically anywhere....

U might be walking down the road,

buying chocolates,

recharging your cell phone,

hanging out with friends,

sitting alone (wondering Rajnikanth`s superpowers)

and Bang!!!

There comes a ZombieX...

But u need not worry they,are not the conventional half dead zombies coming after you (with twisted legs, floating hands and yellow teeth) to have your leg piece. They (ZombieX) is coming near you to........

Ignore you.

Now ZombieX can be categorized in many ways.

• People you once knew, but have not been in touch with them.
• People whom you know but you don`t really get along with them.
• People who BECOME ZombieX when they are with a particular kind of people(e.g girlfriend(s), other people having powerful ZombieX aura)
• People too Proud to look at mere mortals.
• People who like you, but somehow you are not in their "interaction" list currently.
• ........ blah blah blah

There are a zillion categories.Now let me tell you how they attack. They attack mentally. when you incidentally come in their field of view what they do is..

• They look through you(Assuming you are transparent)
• Suddenly there is an urge to checkout a nearby object(e.g the ceiling, the walls, the tissue paper lying on the floor, shoe laces etc.) which co-incidentally are in complete opposite directions to where u are sitting.
• They give the "why are you smiling/waving, do i know you??" look.
• They look at you and they look at something else immediately in a fraction of a second(ya this thing needs practice)
• They take out their phone and start punching buttons(giving you the hint that they are kinda busy/important).
• They lock their destination Co-ordinates and don`t look here and there.
• They smile at you but later you find out that it was for someone sitting on the back table(classic ZombieX weapon).

I have one question.

What did i do to be treated like this? Why is so difficult to convey human emotion which God`s gift to mankind? (okay sorry there are two questions)

i have been attacked so many times that i`am writing this post. Awareness is all we need. Innocent people(Homo Sapiens) should be aware of these Emotional Atyacharis. I urge all Homo Sapiens to join hands and fight against the ZombieXs. Their army is increasing constantly. We need to create our Own. Together we can teach them that it is easier to smile rather than trying to look through an opaque object. People together we can create a world of love, respect and manners(most importantly).

PS

Here`s a list of things that you can do when you are attacked.

• Take a step. Go face to face (Darr ke aage jeet hai)
• Insult them by calling them visually impaired, deaf, donkey (Recommended only to people having a martyr attitude)
• Do not Ignore the attack, that's how the virus spreads.
• Let them know what they did(in a polite way).

Lets show them that this is planet Earth belonging to homo-sapiens not Zombieland !!

Cheers to Manners Etiquettes And humanity !

Peace

IPL Manoranjan Ka Baap(not biological)

I remember watching the add "manoranjan ka baap kaun hai?"on sony.Two young boys(one of them named Manoranjan) find it hard to answer when people asked them about the identity of their dad.But then came their daddy.....None other than IPL(No these are not initials,Its Indian Premire League).The boys enjoy new found confidence/arrogance and the woman gains back her respect.In the end they click a family picture with a TV set displaying DLF IPL.The add was hilarious!

Coming to the point i must say that IPL has indeed proved itself to be the big daddy of indian television.IT started the rat race of buying teams.From the king of bollywood to the king of good times all started bidding for their bangtails.It was worth watching! Players being sold at prices at par with pre historic antique pieces.IPL is not just about the game...it was about taking cricketing experience to the next level..from cheer girls to "strategic" breaks..it started it all.

This season IPL tied up with YouTube for live streaming and replay of all matches,which was first of its kind.It also introduced broadcasting of matches in theatres(some in 3D,AVATAR effect) this was not enough it also introduced SPIDER CAMS...that would crawl in the field and capture uncommon camera angles(e.g. view from beneath their pants :P)

Recently i went to witness IPL matches at the barbati stadium, Cuttack.I must say it was totally different from a normal ODI match.There was a stage,a Deejay,music,cheer girls(cant help but notice).Everytime a six was shot..firecrackers kissed the sky(and of course the cheer jumped to life :P) the crowd cheered for both the sides.Coz both sides had their favourites ! Thats the magic IPL has.But sometimes people get emotional and become region oriented(sure MNS would love it).

But we cant help it cause in India cricket is not less than a war.It was an experience worth remembering(all those who say "It is always better in TV/YouTube" have`nt actually been through it.

IPL has brought out a revolution in the cricketing world.It has given way to new talent..Got women to the stadiums given them a break from TV soaps.It has added "glamour" to cricket.It has captured hearts worldwide,united different cricketing pundits across the world to play as a team.Juggled indian money across the globe,created more employment options.Hence proved that BCCI is the big daddy in the cricket universe.

Hats off to Lalit Modi !

Intelligent TV Adds(sarcasm intended)

Q>what you will find in this post?

A>Irrational Advertisements.

:D

1)JK cement-they show a girl in swimsuit walking on the beach(ya she`s got that seductive look) for the first time you see...u wonder..okay this must be the a for white mischief or durex or some holiday package...finally when you are done guessing the punch line comes up...

"iss me kuch khaas hai..JK cement"

:P WTF ?

2)Wild stone- The add features a DUDE who apparently uses this wild deo(i.e.wild stone) and he somehow possesses the power to attract women(who are usually married) and then gradually sleeps with them...

Yaar is it just a deo or sex stimulant?

u guess. :P

3) Domino`s ad -The pizza is delivered and the girls starts eating it(while standing on her balcony) and cheese drops fall on ground and guess what?? People down are hopping to catch a drop or two.Most of them in seem well dressed(i.e belonging to well to do families) are they so desperate for cheese ?Hopping for few drop of cheese that might even contain the girls saliva.. :P

guys get your own pizza/buy cheese from the nearby store.

4)Nirma ad-The same song is played...Of course there is a woman(dressed in white).She is walking on a bad road full off water puddles.A car splashes water as it passes through the bad patch...guess what happens???This woman starts saying a spell(i.e the lyrics of the song) that causes the water to freeze in mid air...and when the spell is over the water(dirty brown) settles down(disobeying all laws of physics) instead of spilling on her saree.

i have 1 question..

WHERE WERE YOU WHEN THE TSUNAMI DISASTER TOOK PLACE?

:P

5)DoCoMo- Normal people travelling on this train.Suddenly a guy stands up(you wonder is he gonna hijack the train? no its worse ) He starts singing.Do Doo DO...and then guess what others join him (all of them seem to be professionally trained) one after the other...they sing this jingle that seems never ending.One of the most irritating adds i`ve ever seen.People actually hate the product without even using it!

:P

This is not all.I`ll be updating this post on regular basis.

Keep smiling.

:)

fitness "pricks"

okay guys.. my first blog post..n i seriously needed a topic. so i chose my comeback at the gym.

i always liked working out(but never i am regular) ..stepping into the gym is like entering into a warzone.everybody tries to outdo others with their "Dolle sholle".and with my kinda physique u r bound to feel like a pygmie surrounded by basketball players..

as i was working out i noticed that there are 3 kinds of ppl who come to the gym..

1>the power horses/red bulls - who are pretty serious about having a good physique.gymming is there passion and they would rather miss a movie,a party or even a date but never skip gymming.I have real respect for these guys.hats off to you people (you`ve made it! )

2>the dudes-who have"okay" kinda physique but are dressed in the most expensive training attires...they spend more time socializing and flaunting their gadgets.every time they finish a set they flex in front of the mirror expecting miracles.self obsession is the word for them. everyday they squint through mirrors, examine every part of the body and say "oh my god, whhatta body!"these people mostly gym to grab female attention(poor fellas..end up with dumb girls :P)

3>the uncles- slight gray hair, beer belly,expensive but boring training gear....thats it! you have spotted an uncle! these people are somewhat regular but everytime you see them you are bound to wonder..."this guy sweats like a pig everyday...but then, NO EFFECT!". i`ll tell you why.when he returns home he takes his share of peg.next morning wakes up..feels satisfied about visiting the gym..then stuffs aloo paratha down his throat.

But i would like to tell you about one guy who does not come under any category....

i call him the HEADTURNER- this guy...i feel is mentally sick.he suffers from split personality disorder.one half being him..the other half being a chimpanzee.he does exercises which even the trainer cant explain why its done.he dances while he works out..he meditates..he communicates with god...he practices martial arts...you imagine animal planet you see it in him.i am telling you this guy is bound to turn people`s heads when he`s around.hats off to you too "chimp-man-ji"

:D

have a great day/night!

keep smiling.

pAt Abhisek.